Assignment four reflections post feedback

Images (as opposed to the images of texts):

Landscapes are working, the size is fine and work within the context of the work.

Artifacts: the placement and the scaling of the objects need to be refined. The current variability in the printed page is incoherent and the scale makes them more difficult to ‘read’. Maybe central, although critical to the work is the impression of emotional ‘distance’. Life size is just too small – maybe workshop, or test other presentations to gauge how to develop a stronger visual strategy. “Play with scale” and have a consistent (probably centralized) depiction. Suggestion to look at the work of Raphaël Dallaporta.

Texts: Critical area for consideration. Overall the diversity of the texts created an overdeveloped richness in the narrative which confuses and misleads the viewer. The inconsistency of the sources is perhaps at the heart of these criticisms, whilst the placing of the texts on the page also added to it. The suggestion would be to research a body of work that I might use: suggestions were temporal – a relevant subject from one time to another, or topical. The use of one personal text could be developed into multiple. Either way, refining the source is vital for the work.

A suggestion to present this work at an informal session at the next Family Ties Network in Glasgow, in November, was suggested. Wendy has already opened the way by mentioning the work – though not sharing it – with Dr. Nicky Bird one of the principle organisers of the group.


I’m pleased that the scale of the landscape images are working, and that the imagery seems to be as well. No suggestion was made to alter the image edit/sequence – though I think it is implicit that that is a significant possibility after more work is done on the artifacts and texts, which are in need of a lot of work. I will continue to work in Purgatory to look for more imagery and expect to rework the sequencing on a regular basis. No comment was made on the sequencing strategy, perhaps I should find a way to gauge it’s validity?

I am also less concerned with the artifacts, I agree that the placing of the imagery is vital and will look at scale. I’ll discuss with the archivist that I spoke to from the Ashmolean as to placement etc. Wendy said something about scratches, wear &c. on the objects, about how important/significant they are. I will think about that as my concern is critical distance between those items that were his, and which are now, by legacy, mine.

As regards the texts, I think I need to re-think the whole strategy. Texts are vital to the work, they bring context and possibly direction, but the ‘scattergun’ approach I had employed, which tried to weave ‘absence’ ‘love’ ‘paternalism’ &c., did not succeed. I have a notion that I will revert to very personal recollections.

I am now in conversation with Dr. Nicky Bird about an informal ‘New Voices” presentation at the forthcoming FTN event in November. Excited and daunted.




2 thoughts on “Assignment four reflections post feedback

  1. I’m so pleased to know that you’ve started the conversation re “New Voices” and do hope you stay with the excitement which I’m sure will power further development of the work.
    I remember I commented on the text. I know you were wanting to keep some emotional distance and that was necessary as you were working through all the associated memories and feelings. There’s something in my mind now about the actual wording of recollections and how this can change the emotional tone, e.g. using the third person, as if you were an observer of yourself; interviewing yourself.

    • The one text I provided was in the first person and I am thinking of developing others to go with it. I see what you mean about third party distance/detachment though. Something to think about. Thanks.

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